I was thinking about yesterday’s post on forgiveness, and I think maybe it was a little insensitive to those who have experienced significant trauma in their past. “Just forgive; it’s our responsibility!” may have been the message one got from yesterday’s post. Well, it is a lot easier said than done in some cases. I hear you.
Many people struggle emotionally to forgive a hurtful individual, and it is not easy to forgive someone who has wielded degrading insults and abusive behavior like a sword for many years. The thought of forgiveness as a responsibility with an attitude of humility no doubt evokes the same response as the disciples: “Increase our faith!” Forgiving others is perhaps the most difficult part of a Christian’s life — which is why we are unable to do it without Christ. When the pain runs deep, the need for God’s supernatural power to provide understanding and a peace deeper than the pain is needed. If you struggle in this area of forgiveness due to years of scarring, I know of no formulas to release the pain. But I will tell you that it begins with Christ and pondering and reflecting on His wonderful forgiveness in our own lives. I think of that verse that says, “We love because He first loved us.” (1John 4:19) God’s great love for us paid the price of forgiveness. Dwell on that for a while and then consider just how much God loves you. Consider how special you are in His eyes even when you failed Him over and over again. And then pray that the truth of that reality might give you the strength to begin the process of healing to forgive your offender. It is not easy. Not wanting to sound too cliche or flippant, but Scripture is true: “Not by might, nor by power (and this means our own might and power), but by my Spirit” says the Lord Almighty. (Zech. 4:6) The power to forgive begins and ends with Christ and the power of His Spirit in our lives.